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I’ve switched around between reading 4 different books today. “How to cheat in Adobe Flash CS3” (praised on amazon as a great honest resource of animation and design tricks), “Learning ActionScript 3.0″ (looked straight forward to me so i bought it to balance out the first book, also purchased earlier tonight at Borders), Penny Arcade 3: The Warsun Prophecies” (rented from the library, a fun collection of old strips and commentaries from 2002. it astonishes me how much MORE i appreciate Penny Arcade – the DEEPER i dig into it. those boys were damned talented even 6 years ago), and HP Lovecraft’s At The Mountains of Madness (also rented from the library. I’ve already read the story several times, but I was eager to read this editions lengthy intro and 70 page extra feature: HP’s essay, “Supernatural Horror in Literature”).

This last book is what disturbed me forth into writing this brief blog. The introduction by China Mieville deeply disturbed me. China beats around the bush a bit, heaps on the praise, and annoys with a variety of excessively obscure words (it seems everyone does this when surrounding some HPL text. but only HPL manages to avoid annoying. HPL seems to be taking the english language very seriously, whil everyone else is just showing off or imitating).

China ends with a focus on what must have been the real purpose. a huge slam on HPL for his racism and elitism. China points out that the whole book (SPOILERS! …?) is about: elitist fears of the uneducated masses. HPL supposedly converteded to socialism as the great depresssion set in, having given up on the Capitalist experiment. But HPL hoped for some small oligarchy of the intelligent and well bred to take control, and thus avoid any messy revolutions. because revolutions generally destroyed culture. and HPL was deathly afraid of the lesser people that surrounded him. thus the cyclopean cities found in the ice are directly symbolic of themes in some social politics HPL was reading/promoting. cities that out grew themselves, sucked everything out of the surround nature (literally a giant black city in a white void). The protagonists see the heights of this civiliation in the art/carvings, but quickly see this art becoming a self parody. and eventually an embarassment. and the Shoggoth slave class that revolted (and are now, quite revolting in appearance), are still in the skummy depths beneath the city. plus, the “tekeli-li” and giant albino penguins are supposedly direct references to an earlier story by Poe.

this intro blew my mind.

it serves to destroy any chance i’ll ever have of respecting HPL as a person (which makes it hard for me to champion his works. he endorsed hitler for chrissakes), and also serves to explain how his well written but seemingly-silly horror story is actually a careful deep social commentary, mixed with subtle literary references to his heroes that might put tarantino to shame, mixed with a subtle psychological symbolism (drilling beneath the surface, to face the monsters within) that he may or may not have even been aware of it.

it lightly boggles my mind.

So i’m playing the “political history” commentary on the 13 Days DVD (also rented from the library, as i’ve been obsessing about the history/politics of the 60’s this week), and trying to relax.

I can’t seem to get my head around all the nuances of “context” surrounding the society of 1959-79, so i won’t claim to understand the context of HPL’s social times. and thus i won’t seek to judge HPL’s apparent psychological/character problems. And i’ll sit here wondering how well i even understand the context of modern day society. hmmf. (depressing).

uh, the short story: I quit cigarettes a little over two weeks ago, and still haven’t gotten back on track. I’m spending a ton of time on everything BUT relevant work.

I’m currently cleaning up and organizing: everything.

listening to an interview with the smart guy behind “the design of everyday things” (and a series of related books that i was unaware of. oop)
http://www.core77.com/broadcasts/src/core77_broadcasts_norman.mp3
a lof of good/interesting “big picture” thoughts about humanity’s relationship to technology.

I quit smoking a week ago. then went camping over the weekend. I’m now entering that shakey period where i think i’ve weathered the worst of it, and it’s time to start re-entering my normal activities. Yesterday i got a call in the early morn (well, 9am) asking if i could have storyboards finished by 5pm. And I was like “hello? wha? who is this?” got it done. but it was yet another curveball.

so now, to get back on track. i’m cleaning up everything. organizing each individual piece of paper in the three separate 10 inch stacks that have been on the floor at the foot of my bed for months. downloaded and ran CCleaner and SpyBotS&D to try and speed up my computer. the first cleaned out 8 gigs of wasted space. the second found nothing. sooo. hmm.

anywho. the only thing i really wanted to post was this: three random ideas from recent camping trip (which will no doubt be lost for years, in my drawers of random story ideas):

1-surfing haunted waves.
2-short film about “never turn your back on the ocean” warning sign. father plays with son, and keeps eying the ocean nervously. it seems that tiny sneaking waves are the worst of his troubles. until a giant tree washes up at 60 mph, and totally gores him to death.
3-i’d like to see a short “sciNow” movie about resolving a traffic skirmish with tech. ie, reckless driver cuts off our hero on some winding country roads. Our hero’s passenger takes series of flashy photos, sends them to cops. blares warnings of impending legal over loud speakers atop hero car. reckless driver goes from living life like a soulless video game, to seriously fearing for the repurcussions of his actions.

ra.

Just a quick update on life stuffs.

Flew up to seattle on Monday to meet the team (of dudes i’m making storyboards for). I’ve been highly stressed for days, leading up to this meet. Now i am left a little down, brain dead, and eager to attack projects.

Feels like i’ve been spending all my free time on everything EXCEPT what i need to be focusing on: VidHero.

So i’m sitting down tonight to lock the script and roughs for issue two of vidHero. I’ll be doing it in a word document table, because i’m still in this corporate-storyboard mindset. Excited to put this bitch to bed, and move on to fresher stories. Though i should probably endeavor to make this bitch fresh again… Just not sure how. hmm.

Anywho. Also need to get the &#%!ing shopping cart up. although it seems pointless, because i can’t see anyone actually visiting this site and deciding to buy something. must do it anyway. because i gots shits to sells. and maybe 10 to 20 friends will buy things. and it’ll be a good learning experience. … i am writing all this down to try and talk myself into doing it. urgh.

anywho. Not much else to report. Not sure what i’ve already reported. which is a sign that not much has changed in the last week or two. sooo, i’ll leave off. sign off. shove off. for now.

SUPER INSANE-O-PANTS!

sooo, i’m out of my mind with busy. Monday a friend suggested his team might need me to do some story boards for some videos they’re handling for a big corporation. I worked hard all day tuesday to deliver some flash mock ups for the local video game making project. then wednesday i sat down and cranked out a sample storyboard sequence to try and land the job. I got the job. then thursday i sat around mostly fretting over how not to make an ass of myself (while also doing my finances, and spitballing various concepts to convey the video’s proposed message), and then got a call to head downtown and discuss the first video in detail. Today, er, yesterday- friday – I spent alllll day cranking out the first official boards. then i realized i was out of time, (the guy wanted them asap, to show the client), so i skipped polishing them and made up a sequence with the raw pencils.

a questionable move. hoping i didn’t make a mistake there. ehhhh.

but now i find myself beyond exhausted. too many hours without enough breaks. if you figure i made 20 drawings on wednesday, and 59 today, that’s like making 3 pages of a comic book in one day, spending the next day feeling sick with nervous idiocy, then making 10 pages the following day. 10 fucking pages is insane. I usually feel great if i can manage one page in a day. INSANE! not to mention all the focus/stress of trying to juggle concepts and storytelling/editing and vectors in your head. there is no room left in my head. i can’t remember what i was going to do this week for vidHero. ugh. though i do feel like i’m battering myself into a faster working methodologgygygygyg

ANd in theory, i should sit down first thing tomorrow morning and start polishing the drawings, for max professionalitytytytytyt,y.

but. geez. i dunno. i’m lightly hoping they’ll be thrilled with the raw pencils. though they seem embarassing to me. though i’ve underestimated people’s enjoyment of my rough work before. though. ugh.

anywho. it’s late. time for sleep. just noting the news.