Legion:
whoa-hooooooo. Turns out Legion SUCCCCKed. do not go see Legion. ugh. uhhhh.
(if you loved “The Prophecy”… maybe you should just rent this one. If you loved 300… know that this movie was also made for trucker rednecks, but didn’t bother to steal decent one-liners from other movies. Also this one mysteriously had zero naked men. so, sorry bout that.)
My brain is still kind of hurting. i guess it had some fun bad CGI moments. the good ones ruined by the trailer. My mom actually turned to me at one point and said “oh i remember this from the trailer.”
something seriously wrong about that, and modern trailers. I wonder if the ruinous trailer actually made the movie less interesting. maybe if it had all been a complete surprise…
no. no.
*SPOILERS* Continue reading “Legion : 1 big fail out of 4 medium stars…”
Category: review
Top 5 trailers of 2009 (now with tasty embedded clips!)
So, here are the best short promotions that knocked my socks off this year. (heh, music videos basically?!?!). Regardless of the final product, these bad boys got under my skin.
Continue reading “Top 5 trailers of 2009 (now with tasty embedded clips!)”
Top 11 movies of 2009: (with complaints and annoyances on one side / and the highlights and personal-reasons-I-loved-it on the right)
Demon’s Souls (1%) – 10/10!
(The idea of this title is to mention how much of the game I’ve played before giving this rating. So i could go back at 50% and say “shit/10”, and again at whatever point I give up on ever playing it again).
So I basically got through the training levels last night. Which might even be less than 1% of the game?
But I’m totally psyched to go on, so I feel a need to rant it out.
* I’m still avidly addicted to watching Zero Punc. (which I think would be a charming new name/spelling for the show, implying both punk rock and a disdain for explaining your abbreviations through the use of proper punctuation). Continue reading “Demon’s Souls (1%) – 10/10!”
Macbeth (2006)- -8/2000
The Short:
This was a horrible failure at making: movies, plays, and entertainment in general.
The Road – 27.65345241 / 29.937517
I really got into this movie. Saw it with about 5 other people, and am not sure what they thought. Perhaps because it left me in a very glum private place, thinking about personal things. I haven’t read the book. But i feel like the director did what he wanted. And I applaud the story for not bothering with details of the apocalypse. In a way, I think it is the story of a second apocalypse (or “the real apocalypse”) -as this guy’s family collapses. Continue reading “The Road – 27.65345241 / 29.937517”
Fantastic Mr. Fox – 10/10
I’ve been meaning to put up a review of this movie. But there’s really nothing to say. Except
- It was perfect
- I can’t think of any way to improve any part of it
- I didn’t have time to stop and think about the movie, because I was constantly whisked along by it’s roller coaster plot and adorable details.
The perfect incredible achievement movie of the year. (i’d have to knock Moon down to 9.9/10 for it’s maybe sorta cheesy global warming fuel commercial thing/moments. It was handled fine, sure, but I wouldn’t have done it that way. Whereas, again, in Fantastic Mr. Fox – I never had a chance to stop and second guess any part of the movie.)
truly incredible.
SPOILER:
(the Rat was my favorite character. each movement and dialog delivery had me giggling maniacally. I was thrilled to see that Willem DaFoe had done the voice, whilst reviewing the credits. I hadn’t recognized the voice. It raises him up a bit, in my book).
(jason Schwartzman also floored me with his great voice acting. I wonder if i would have enjoyed it as much knowing he and DaFoe were lending voice ahead of time. hmm. this is why i post a “spoiler” alert).
(I thought the whole thing felt like the DVD art for Rushmore and Royal Tennebaums come to life. My pal Jonason noted that the director didn’t draw that art. soo. I dunno what that means. but this review feels too short. so i jot it down.).
Ninja Assassin – 9/10
I really enjoyed this movie. It is a gore fest Ninja movie through and through (which I haven’t seen in years).
It’s possible the things i thought were mistakes (watery blood. verses wounds that weren’t bleeding. shots with inconsistent lighting), were actually nods to old Ninja movies. It really did feel like someone’s attempt to do for Ninja movies what kill bill did for … every shaw brothers movie ever made? hmm. Continue reading “Ninja Assassin – 9/10”
review: The Box – 4/5
Watched The Box tonight, and really enjoyed it. While I don’t like camaroon diaz much at all, I loved pretty much everyone else. Also, I should probably disclose that I’m inexplicably a huge James Marsden fan (ever since Gossip), so I was quietly thrilled that he was getting his shot. I remember seeing frank langella in Body Of Evidence and thinking “Oh how the mighty have fallen.” And I didn’t really believe or respect his recent Nixon performance. but He totally fucking owns every moment he’s onscreen in this movie, methinks. It was like christopher lee or patrick stewart – you just find youself thinking this guy is dripping with presence. Continue reading “review: The Box – 4/5”
Review: Pandorum – 4.9/5
Saw this flic with my dear ol’ mom tonight. My treat, to help her get her mind off my recently passed Aunt Marie.
This movie kicked ass! I hesitate to say it’s perfect, but can’t think of any specific problem. Maybe some of the “so dark and shakey you aren’t sure what’s going on or where you are” was iffy… but that really worked well with the horror/suspense. Maybe the “audio blast so loud you have to jump in your seat” was too easy… but nowadays this almost seems like painting the sets in oil – it just crafts a mood and elevates the tension. Maybe…? All in all, I think I only hesitate to give it a perfect 5 out of 5 because it didn’t grab me on a personal level. I didn’t really want to be any of the characters. So it was just a kick ass sci fi thrill ride, perfectly executed.
Anywho. If you haven’t seen it, but are considering it: stop reading this and just go fucking watch it. Continue reading “Review: Pandorum – 4.9/5”